Posts Tagged ‘Family’

The Heat Miser

My brother

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Ok actually I guess it’s the grand canyon state. But so far I’ve seen alot more cactus then grand canyon. P.S. for those who didn’t know? I’m in Mesa staying with my moms cousin for a while working at her husbands orthodontist office… working is a loose term, perhaps standing around wishing I could do stuff would be better. So far I have learned…

120 degrees? Completely possible. I thought I knew hot before, turns out I never even met the guy
sometimes you can be so hot that getting in the pool just makes you feel gross
Little boys can actually be terrorists and when working together can actually tie you to a chair
Saying “Nice to meet you”  to someone you’ve never seen in your life just isn’t good enough for some people, the may prefer “Wow your teeth are really crooked Kelli, we’ll have to get braces on you right away”
Mesa Arizona is sortof like a little annex of Utah… complete with tons of 8 kids families and children with BOM names all over the place
My cousins husband thinks I’m a so sheltered or whatever that I can’t even identify a saguaro cactus. WRONG sir my mother is a plant genius and I’m pretty sure even people on the east coast know what those are

:) Also these people have a pet pig… snoop hog I can’t tell you how weird I think that is. and they treat it like a baby and it sleeps in the house, so weird. Anyways I think tomorrow I am going to try to cook an egg on the street just to see if it can really be done, I’ve wanted to try that since I was a little kid.

Also let the hunt for The filthy 5, the worlds worst park commence!

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I just tried to feed my rabbit a carrot. Apparently shes not that into carrots… (what a weird rabbit). So not wanting to be wastefull I placed the carrot back in our carrot holder. Heh yes I am 1/2 my fathers side of the family. I might tell my mom next week. She’ll be horrified.

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So today my mom came across the “New Rules” list that we had when I was In about jr. high. I’m not positive though… Anyways this lists contains list of actions and then their monetary consequences. Lets just say I made BANK off this list from my brothers. And now I will share it with you. Parents take note… JK

Food and/or drink in living room- 50 Cents
Calling names- 25 cents
Making Faces- 50 cents (this is where I paid out the most)
Hitting- 50 cents ( I made pretty good money off of this)
Socks in face- 25 cents
Butter cupping- 1$
Blowing/ burping in face or ear- 50 cents ( I made BANK off of this)
Gleeking- 50 cents… if we still played by these rules this rule would make me rich
Water in house- 1$ to person squirted 1$ to mom AND loss of squirting device
Running into people with car- 50 Cents (this is my personal fav)
Spit wad above shoulders- 1$
Spit wad below shoulders- 50 cents
Swearing and Shut up- both 1$

I love that we had to differentiate between spit wad places. As if one is so much better then the other. Also I just discovered that this list was made in 03. heh love it. I imagine that the authors of all the parenting books my mom has read would be horrified

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This is Where I Am












Yeah that’s my front yard. including the about 2 feet of snow. lovely. Also apparently my family is just red neck enough to plant our Christmas tree out in front in our snow bank. CLASSY.

This Is where I should be.
Arizona neighborhood


With perhaps a bit less house clone-age going on. Ahh Arizona sounds nice right now. Someday I will live there. 

I also wouldn’t mind being back here:hawaii sunset

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So Thanksgiving is a holiday and I love holidays. but I do think it is the most boring… of the major holidays. anyways its particularly boring when you go to your grandmas and its all the other families off years, where they go somewhere else you know? so its just my family minus my little brother who was fortunate enough to have to work my grand parents and my wierdyaunt and uncle. So its all sorts of dull cause you don’t even have anyone to joke with but your mom who doesn’t get alot of your brilliant witty remarks. For some un explicable reason this uncle is always called upon to cut whatever type of meat we are eating in this case turkey. no big right? false. Pretty much after every slice he licks all his fingers off. So by the time he is done you feel like alot of his spit might be in your food this bothers some more germaphobic people more then me but I still think its gross and my aunt (his younger sister) wasn’t even there to tell him how unbelievablydisgusting he was. disappointment. I some how mange through dinner answering all their grown up questions. Then it’s over but we all have to sit around and yack about boring stuff like such as: Harry Potter Vs Twilight, Texas, breast cancer, Alaskan oil, The evils of cable TV, benefits of gun control, Internet speed, the national debt… ect. you get the idea. (Really we did discuss every single one of those.) Then my Aunt who apparently is under the mis impression that we are all dying to know about her diabetes problems goes through her and her husband entire list of meals from this week.
Monday: T-bone moose steaks with a light side salad, My uncle has sugar free icecream for desert
Tuesday: Deer Meat with some sort of rice mixture my uncle goes and buys a box of Twinkies even though my aunt tells him to have more of the ice cream
Wednesday: Chef salad, with ham and ice berg and romain and spinach and ham and blah blah blah.

Then she starts to tell me all about her diet. she finally went off candy and soda and now she drinks 4 bottles of water everyday. she also stopped snacking at work so snaps for her.

Next she starts to give my mom parenting advice which is HILARIOUS because her children are in some interesting situations… I would go into the advice and my problems with it but that would be long and boring. sortof like this already it.

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Alright, So I’m not. And I may have stolen this idea from the brilliant mind of Sadies sister Sarah. meh details anyways, One time about 2 months ago I was surfing blogger blogs. and suddenly by some genius stroke of luck I ran accross my dear cousins blog. I was unaware he had a blog… this made me smile because I get alot of joy spying on people. Unfortunatly his blog is quite boring, which makes his title of “my crazy college life” VERY misleading. So today in hopes of getting him to write something mildly interesting I decided to leave him a comment, however unwilling to let him know I read his blog, I created a new alterego for myself… LORD VOLDEMORT. I even created an email address so I was allowed to comment on his blog. It is voldemorttheevilgenius@gmail.com . I actually think this is so great i might start telling people to send my emails here. Here is what people will recieve if they email me there…

Harry Hunting BRB Re:‏
From: Voldemort (voldemorttheevilgenius@gmail.com)
Sent: Thu 11/20/08 6:02 PM
To: youremailhere@yourdomain.com
You have reached Lord Voldemort, Lord of all evil. I'm currently off
hunting that blasted boy. I'll get back to you ASAP

TTYL, Lord Voldemort


anyways I told him his life doesn’t seem crazy at all, hopefully now we will get something more interesting

Here is the link to my profile: http://www.blogger.com/profile/15406366828669540891

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4th folder, 4th picture. I actually wasn’t going to do this Tag when I saw it on other peoples blogs. But then I went and looked at my 4th folder, 4thpicture and couldn’t resist.

on the left is my little brother, on the right my cousin. you may think the white line on my brother is his underwear at first glance. WRONG. That is his burn line. We were in Hawaii and that was his 5th day without sunscreen. LOVE IT. Also the looks on their faces are pretty funny. Its obvious they both think they are wicked awesome.

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Most people Don’t really love to mow the lawn. I don’t. It’s hot, it takes a long time, you get dirty, and you might step on something. I would far rather do other household chores like vacuming or cleaning stuff, even gardening. I just get so bored mowing. Overtime I have perfected the skills necessary to evade this tedious chore but make the most of it when I can no longer avoid it.

The first step is to avoid being in the room when your parents are asking someone else to mow. This makes it more difficult for them to point out that you haven’t mowed the lawn recently. If you cannot avoid being called on remind your parent that you have a job, this works particularly well if your other siblings don’t. If you do end up  having to mow you have a couple of options proceed to mowing or put it off till more money is offered for your valuble time. OR Demand extra money for certain extra things like picking up fallen fruit. Those aren’t actually that important.

Moving on to the actual mowing of the lawn. I am a natural at being bad at mowing lawns and more then one person has commented on it. This does not bother me. It comes from being a very spacey person:D Now If you aren’t naturally bad you have to look naturally bad. I am naturally bad and accidently do all of these except the third one.

Randomly Switch Directions (This really annoys some people and leaves some little strips of unmowed grass)
Go choppy around the trees, its hard to mow aorund them and make them look good
Don’t move objects like your brothers golf balls, mow small circles around them
Run over pine cones and sticks

Whenever I finish my mom always re remembers why she doesn’t love me to mow the lawn. YAY! I Have only mowed twice this summer:D woot

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You know my Green Sea turtle I tubed the river with?

He lost his life at Lake Powell… He took a screw to the head and instantly deflated. Ouch. I wanted to bury him there but my mom wouldn’t let me. Apparently thats littering. haha. Anyways. I had an awesome time. Here is one of my favorite pass times

It might not look that fun and really boating was my fav pass time but when you spent more then half your day on the house boat this was awesome, Wind in your hair, The constant fear that one of the boys sitting next to you would shove you off or jump off himself, freaking out the grown ups. Whats not to love? Those are my cousins with me. Now the highlights and I suppose low lights of my trip.

Killer Mat burn on my Elbow from tubing
Jumping off a 30ish foot cliff
Getting my best tan that didn’t include going to hawaii
Losing and finding my Fav red sunglasses 6 times
Sleeping up on the deck and Having bats swoop at me
Hanging out with my wierd cousins till I started to talk like them. eek

 And more pictures if you feel the desire

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